I'm not gonna lie.
Mother's Day is a Catch-22 for me.
I love that I am a mom!
I love that I get to spend this day with my boys!
But not being able to share this day with my mom is a hidden pain that I normally don't allow to surface much anymore.
On Mother's Day, I think of how she longed to be a grandmother.
I think about the things we would have shared.
I think about how we would have spent this day.
Mark Twain might have said it, but it fit my mother perfectly, "My mother had a slender, small body, but a large heart - a heart so large that everybody's joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation."
So even though I will have a smile on my face and will enjoy this day with my boys, underneath I will be thinking:
I miss you. I hate that I have to try to remember everything that you taught me... instead of calling you on the phone and just asking for the advice. I love that you taught me the true meaning of what being a mom is all about... that your children are everything and the your world revolves around them. I hope that the job I am doing with my children will do justice to all that you taught me through your actions, not your words. I love you.
I know many people who are without their mothers on this Mother's Day... it is not a club any of us chose to be a part of. So if you still have yours here on Earth, tell them that you love them, tell them 'thank you', and thank your lucky stars you can hug them just one more day.
Surfing Sunday 08.20
6 hours ago