I may have the last name as them... But...

I don't know why I have struggled so much this summer.
Maybe it's because my ex is having a baby...
Maybe it's because I don't know my place or role anymore...
You see...
My boys have gone on a 2 week family vacation with my ex and his WHOLE family.
Vacations I used to go on.
Places I used to go to.
Family I used to see.

And even though R's family has been tremendous to not exclude me in most things, the truth is I'm an outsider... and will forever more be an outsider.

I have no desire to be back with R.  Please don't think that.
I just miss that I'm missing out on adventures and family time... with a family that I dearly love.