Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Beekeeping - Day 1

I had never planned to be a beekeeper.

Sure, I love it every year in May when I call my beekeeper friend on the phone to invite him to come to summer school and he says, "I've been waiting for your phone call."

I love all of the cool things he has taught me about bees...
But I never planned to be a beekeeper.

Todd back when he was planning on buying his land would bring up different topics:
Fruit trees.
Berry bushes.

On all of them, I just smiled and said how much work they would be... or how he didn't know what he was getting himself into (esp. goats).

I know he was just trying to get me as excited about the future he is planning as he was.
I've tried to explain the none of my futures have panned out and I'm done planning for them... what comes, comes.
So, he jumped on the beekeeping bandwagon when he saw how excited it made me.

Really, truly, it made me excited because I had learned so much over the past 5-6 years with my beekeeping friend and I wanted to share my knowledge...
Never did I think it would land me in charge of 10,000 bees.

But here I am...

So, to prepare myself, I painted the hive.

Then, I tried on my bee suit.

So, today I drove to get the bees...
When I stopped to take this picture, the people selling the bees asked if I was second-guessing my decision to get bees...

I didn't have an option... Beekeeping, here I come.

First, I opened the nuc box.

Then, I pulled out the queen's box.  Her servants were surrounding her.

Then, I poured them in... Who knew you could pour bees...

I was happy that things went smoothly.

They quickly started coming in and out of the hive.

I stood in awe.
The buzzing.
Buzzing. Buzzing. Buzzing.
The calmness the buzzing brought.
I could have stood there all night.
Bees coming and going around me.
Not caring that I had just moved them to a new home.
Not caring that I kept peeking inside.

Yes.  I had no plans of becoming a beekeeper...
...but now, now there is no going back from it.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

it hasn't been easy

People see how R and I act around each other and they say, "Wow. You guys make divorce look easy."
Most of the time, I just smile and say, "We're doing what's best for our boys."

However, it hasn't been easy.
The pain.
The hurt.
The crying.
The questions.
The guessing and second guessing.
The insecurity.
The feeling of worthlessness.
The stone face to prove that you are fine.
The pulling yourself up because up is the only direction you can go.
The belief that you will make it through.
The forgiveness.
It hasn't been easy.

So when a friend is wanting to divorce his wife and tells her, "It will be fine.  We will be fine.  Divorce is easy, just look at R. and Dawn."

It takes ALL of me to not shake him and tell him that it is ANYTHING but easy.

Thursday, April 9, 2015

You can't put toothpaste back in the tube

Ever since the Random Act of Kindness, I have been in a weird funk.

It was like emotions that I had bottled up had been knocked loose... and now I can't catch them and successfully push them all back in, like too much toothpaste that has been squeezed out.

I know these emotions are because of the uncertainties in my life.
I don't like uncertainties.

You see... I will no longer be teaching third grade next year.
I keep saying it, because I honestly am trying to convince myself that it is true.
I feel like I'm losing a bit of myself.
I'm so VERY proud to be a teacher.
I know I will still be a teacher... it just won't be the same and I am finding myself relishing in each thing that I know will be my "last"... and fighting back the tears.

Todd has been great.
He keeps telling me how wonderful this new position is and how they picked ME for a reason... because they knew I had the mind-set and the out-of-the-box thinking that is needed.  That I shouldn't be scared and to keep moving forward.

My student teacher has also been great.
To start off, she seriously got mad at me when I told her I was leaving the classroom.  I know that doesn't sound like it would be helping, but it affirmed that *I* really was making a difference where I was at.
It also showed me that I could make a difference on a bigger scale.

It has made the twinge of pain just slightly less when my principal told me today that she was going to hire my student teacher to take my position.

I don't know why... but knowing it will be her makes this transition easier... Maybe because I know she will let me come visit any time... and I know my partner in crime, SD, will be treated well.

Anyhow, if you see me anytime soon and my eyes are red and puffy... Let's just say it's because of allergies, okay?

Friday, April 3, 2015

When you least expecting it

I'm a firm believer in Random Acts of Kindness.
I teach it to my children.
I teach it to my students.

I tell them, "Keep your eyes open. LOOK for that opportunity.  Look and look hard!  Find someone that isn't suspecting it.... and then rock their world!"

Well... for all the preaching I do... I definitely didn't see this afternoon coming!

I had to make a quick, last minute run to the store for things to finish up my nephew's birthday cake.  I needed more powder sugar and Oreos to crush to make look like dirt.

There was an elderly woman in front of me.  She had paid for her groceries and it was taking her some time to put her money away.  I wasn't really paying attention other than I knew she wasn't done and I didn't want her to feel pressured to go any faster.  I wasn't in any type of hurry.

The cashier than said the total.  It was $6 something.

The elderly woman pulled out a ten dollar bill and handed it to the cashier.
My brain kind of went into slow mode.
I really didn't process what was going on other than I thought she was making a mistake.
So I started to say, "Oh..... No. No. that's my stuff. Sorry."
I really thought that she also hadn't been paying attention.

She looked at me and smiled.
"I know," she said.
I spattered out, "uh... oh.  Thank you. You didn't have to... Happy Easter."

I didn't make it out of the store before I started crying.

It wasn't one of those situations that I needed financially, I could have easily paid for my two items...but I learned I definitely needed it emotionally.
To know there are still good  great people out there.

Not only that...but,She had done it.

She had done what I preached all along... She looked for someone who wasn't suspecting it... and she rocked my world!