Don't get me wrong, I truly desire someone special to check up on me, be there for me, and do nice things for me.
But in all essence, I have never had a guy who was "there" for me.
My ex, R, was a coach.
He was gone every evening for either games or practice.
He coached fall, spring, and summer ball.
It is NO surprise that our boys birthdays are only 4 days apart... July was truly the only month he was home... Nine months fall nicely to the next spring.
Spencer lived 2 and a half ...and then 7 hours away.
I didn't realize it at the time, but he fell right into the pattern I was used to...not seeing the guy I was with very often. Seeing him every other weekend worked out nicely for that.
I felt needed... but ultimately I wasn't "needed" on a daily basis.
Independent... I guess is what you could call it.
That independence has caused me to shy away from