leaving it all behind

The new guy and I still haven't met. I had forgotten about a prior commitment that I had on Thursday night, so we rescheduled for today (Saturday).
But we haven't wasted time in getting to know one another. We have been talking for a week and have already talked 20 hours on the phone. 20 hours!!

Funny how I have yet to meet this man... and yet I dream of him.

Last night I dreamed that he came to stay at my house, except it wasn't my current house, it was my "mom's house".
(I put this in parenthesis because my mom passed away in 1997. She also didn't have a boyfriend at the time.)
She and her current boyfriend were going out of town for the weekend and so we decided to stay there.
After the weekend was over, my mother asked me if I was going to see this one again, I replied with, "I don't know. Maybe. Why?"
"Because he left his boots."

I know...
Different houses are different frames of mind.
My mom represents wholeness to me... so going to stay at her house would represent me feeling whole again.
Someone forgetting their shoes suggests that you are leaving behind your inhibitions.

I know I am very fearful of meeting this guy.
Not fearful in the "I'm scared for my life" type of way, but the "I might actually like him and want him to stick around" kind of way.

The tightness in my chest represents the fear well.

Hopefully, that tightness will be gone soon... I'm ready to leave those inhibitions behind.