Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Discouraged

My school has purchased this fancy-dancy high tech scale... and because I am the building tech person my principal thought I would be the perfect person to take it home and figure it out.

well...I figured it out alright. I figured out that I really don't like a scale to tell me how much I weigh, much less tell me what my body fat %, my water %, my visceral fat #, bone mass %, what body type I am, how many calories I should be intaking, AND what my caloric age is.

Don't get me wrong...I really didn't score poorly. I fell in the average range on everything, but it made me feel weak/fat/discouraged...it turned my "I'm not doing too bad on this exercise thing" to "Gosh...I'll never make it, why even try?"

I realize it's just a scale, but I take these things to heart.

Like when I tried to go running with Spencer and my allergies were acting up and I couldn't breathe and even though I had been running almost 2 full miles the week before, I couldn't even run a quarter of mile with him. And when he got back his friends asked how the run went and how far I had made it and he didn't comment, so they were like, "2 miles?" no. "1 mile?" no. "Oh, you two are definitely NOT going to make it if she can't even run a mile."

(In Spencer's defense he told me that he loved me for me and it didn't matter whether I could run or not...but I still took it to heart.)

You'd think those comments would make me want to go out and try even harder to prove those friends wrong, but it doesn't...it makes me want to quit.

I didn't though...I didn't quit. I didn't go running again until I felt back up to par, but I didn't quit.

I digress back to the scale. After the first ten readings I took, I decided that I could become a little obsessed with it. So this morning I returned it to my principal, showed her how to use it, and told her I was done with it. She asked me why? This scale is a "good" thing. This scale makes me want to quit. I know I shouldn't quit...I know I am keeping myself healthy, but I want to be healthy and not have to be obsessive about it.

So...I am typing up instructions as to how to operate the scale (because I had to go to my principals office 5 times today to show others how to work it - NOT helping with my obsession! or my discouragement) I mean we had one teacher's metabolic age rate at 12 years old...really? I can't compete with that!

1 comment:

  1. I think you look amazing. Please don't quit. If you quit, then what are my chances? ZILCH! No pressure, though.

    ReplyDelete

I LOVE to hear what your thoughts are on my thoughts...so leave me a comment. Tell me what's on your mind!