she doesn't care, but her eyes tell a different story

I thought I was past it.
I thought that even though I had some strife with the mean girl at the beginning of the year, I had managed to get past it.
Even though I didn't have my bestie to stand strong with me against her, I just closed my door and carried on in my own little world.
I thought I was past it.
Then I got my student teacher.... My wonderful student teacher.
I felt horrible that I was keeping him closed off.
It's not how I really am...
I want him to experience everything that should be happening in a school building.
So... I opened my door...
In turn, I opened myself up to hurt.

You see... our grade level had a meeting this morning.
All six of us.
After the meeting was over, we all got up to leave.
Isaac and I were the first to head out.

Less than 5 min later, I remember I had forgot something in the room we had met in.
I walk in.
All five of the other teachers are sitting at the table.
Their conversation stops.
I ask, "What's going on?"
"Oh... we're just planning Science."


Do I care that they are planning it without me?
No. not really.
Am I hurt that they didn't even bother to ask?
yep.
Took all of me to keep it inside and not cry... or scream... or yell.

It put me in a fog that I couldn't shake all day.
I really am trying to be a good mentor here...
Just would be nice to have others around aiding in that process.