Thursday, April 21, 2011

A conversation is a dialogue, not a monologue.

wow. You all are good!
Seriously.
I mean... try to leave one tiny little smidgen of a detail out on a blog post... and BAM!
I get called on it.

It's okay though.
You all have given me advice when I needed it.
You have been there to cheer me on in my lowest of lows
and jump for joy on my highest of highs.
... so I guess I will share.

I went to the Elton John concert on a date... you all knew that.
What I didn't tell you was that it was with a guy I swore I would never go out with again.
It's not that he was a bad guy... in fact, he is very nice, BUT (yes, there's that word!) he is not a talker.

If you haven't noticed, I'm a talker. A conversationalist. I know not a stranger.

But when I am on a date, I don't want to be the only voice that is heard!
I am WAY curious.
I ask a LOT of questions!
But in the same sense, I want questions to be asked of me, as well.
(Guys... this is how a gal knows you care!)

So... on our last date, I would ask a question, he would answer, and the conversation would end.
I mean, I freakin' ate my WHOLE salad without saying a word!! (and no, I did NOT inhale it like teachers are known to do - What??!! I'll give you 15 minutes to eat a whole meal and see how well you do!)

So, because of that, I decided that would be our last date.

Three weeks went by... I hadn't heard from him.
I was relieved.
I don't like to have that conversation (though I do).

Then I got a Facebook friend request.
I know. I know. Why accept him??
I'm just that way.
I don't like to snub people... guess I have been snubbed one too many times in my life.
Facebook is like that for me.
I don't go around requesting people to be my friends very often, but if they want to be mine, why would I say no?
(The answer to that question is a whole other post!!)
So I accepted him as a friend.

He IM'ed me daily.
One day he asked me if I liked Elton John.
"Who doesn't?" I responded.
"Well he is playing here, would you like to go?"
Freak out city!!  My worst fears were coming true, but I played it calm.
"I can't afford that right now."
"I have already bought your ticket, silly! Just say yes!"

I guess you could said flattery does get a guy somewhere...
My previous men haven't lavished me with fancy gifts.
So when I know that a guy has dropped 80 bucks for me not knowing if I would say yes...  it gets him a "yes."

The date went fine.
We went out to dinner ahead of time.
I paid. (My bestie, Laura, rolled her eyes at me when I told her this... she believes a woman should never pay for dinner!)
I paid because it cleared my conscious.
He contributed to the night by buying the concert tickets.
I contributed by buying dinner.
That way I didn't feel quite as guilty... like I was taking advantage.
I had honestly decided last Wednesday that I wasn't going to go.
Then he mentioned that we would be going with friends of his... 3 other couples.
Laura told me I couldn't leave him high-and-dry... that if everyone else was a couple that was going, it would be worse to not go than to "take advantage."

So I went.
You already saw, I enjoyed myself at the concert... because I entertained myself!
Yeah... humor comes from all angles for me.

After the concert in the parking garage, I hear my name being called from a car waiting to leave.
It was my cousin, Andrew, and his wife.
I literally crawled in to hug them.
I hadn't realized it until that moment that I was starved for conversation.
I couldn't stop talking!
I asked questions.
They asked questions.
I was just so happy!!

In that moment, I knew that no matter the flattery, I would never go out with him again.

So... the next day, when he IM'ed me on Facebook....I let him down easy.

What??  I said I had those conversations... I never said they always happened face-to-face.

2 comments:

  1. I agree, it was a good idea to pay for the dinner. And sticking to what is important for you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's good that you paid for dinner and that you let him down.

    p.s. I tried to activate my email not sure if it worked and now wordpress is telling me I don't own that identiy. I will keep playing around.

    ReplyDelete

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