Thursday, April 9, 2015

You can't put toothpaste back in the tube

Ever since the Random Act of Kindness, I have been in a weird funk.

It was like emotions that I had bottled up had been knocked loose... and now I can't catch them and successfully push them all back in, like too much toothpaste that has been squeezed out.

I know these emotions are because of the uncertainties in my life.
I don't like uncertainties.

You see... I will no longer be teaching third grade next year.
I keep saying it, because I honestly am trying to convince myself that it is true.
I feel like I'm losing a bit of myself.
I'm so VERY proud to be a teacher.
I know I will still be a teacher... it just won't be the same and I am finding myself relishing in each thing that I know will be my "last"... and fighting back the tears.


Todd has been great.
He keeps telling me how wonderful this new position is and how they picked ME for a reason... because they knew I had the mind-set and the out-of-the-box thinking that is needed.  That I shouldn't be scared and to keep moving forward.

My student teacher has also been great.
To start off, she seriously got mad at me when I told her I was leaving the classroom.  I know that doesn't sound like it would be helping, but it affirmed that *I* really was making a difference where I was at.
It also showed me that I could make a difference on a bigger scale.

It has made the twinge of pain just slightly less when my principal told me today that she was going to hire my student teacher to take my position.

I don't know why... but knowing it will be her makes this transition easier... Maybe because I know she will let me come visit any time... and I know my partner in crime, SD, will be treated well.

Anyhow, if you see me anytime soon and my eyes are red and puffy... Let's just say it's because of allergies, okay?

1 comment:

  1. You've done again...your second paragraph has reached inside and plucked out something I've been too scared to acknowledge...how do you do that?

    Hope you're enjoying your weekend. X

    ReplyDelete

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