Tuesday, January 29, 2013

character flaw

I don't take criticism well.
Sure... I will sit and take it while others are giving it...
In fact, I go silent. (Something learned early in my life.)
...but then it brews and festers in my brain.

I beat myself up about it.
I play and replay the scenario.
What could I have done differently?
Was I really in the wrong?
Can I make it right?
What if I don't make it right?
Is this how they view me all the time?

Question ...after question ...after question floods my brain.
Then the pit balls in my stomach.
I can't sleep because the unassurance doesn't stop.
And I just want to curl up in my bed and stay there.

But, we all know, staying there isn't reality.
Reality is having to face that person the next day
...when you are exhausted from lack of sleep
...and you aren't at your best
...which just makes the doubt even bigger.

Yeah... I don't take criticism well...

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